It’s 2089. all cops have been replaced by genetically modified dogs that let children pet them, help old ladies cross the street, chase down criminals, never eat donuts, bark at cat-callers, analyze dna, easily track down murders, pee on white collar criminals, and tear the faces off of rapists. utopia has been reached.
How was this accomplished you ask?
Well its simple
Dogs are colorblind
oh my god
I was trying to explain to my grandma what being bisexual meant and saying that I looked at ladies butts and she was all
"You’re not GAY everyone checks out ladies rear ends" and my sister was like "I have never wanted to look at a ladies butt"
Later my grandma called me and was like “I THINK I MIGHT BE A LITTLE GAY”
BEST GRANDMA STORY
boys still call girls weak but many girls voluntarily pull parts of their own eyebrows off their faces by sheer force on a regular basis who the hell do they think they’re calling weak
#dont even get me started on bikini waxing
dealing with boys.
GUYS I JUST REALIZED WHY PAPER BEATS ROCK OH MY GOD
PAPER SYMBOLIZES WORDS WHICH SYMBOLIZES BRAINS
AND ROCK SYMBOLIZES BRAWN.
BRAINS OVER BRAWN.
MIND OVER MATTER.
PAPER OVER ROCK.
You clever little shit.
then what the fuck does scissors mean